“Why do you write gay romance?”
Author interviews always seem to include that question for me. And my answer is probably never entirely satisfactory, mostly because I don’t have the answer. There was no epiphany or grand moment. No critical thought process that I’ve heard other MM Romance authors give.
Gender and sexuality have always been a bizarre concept to me. It’s an autistic thing. I feel a bit detached on the idea of both. So, for me, romance is romance is romance.
While I am a woman and I identify as one, gender is one of those concepts I’ve always been quite detached from. I’ve spoken with other autistics who also find the male/female thing confusing. It’s a hard feeling to accurately describe.
It doesn’t affect my writing–and yet it does.
And by that I mean, when I write my brain doesn’t get caught up on gender differences necessarily in the same ways I see from allistic others. I do, however, seem to get into a rhythm of writing something in particular and struggle to shift into a different area. So, after starting with After the Scrum, my flow has continued with M/M, though all things considered my novels tend to include a diverse group of relationships amongst the cast of characters in the stories.
Sexuality or sexual orientation is equally different in my head from how I hear a lot of allistic authors talking about with their writing.
Sex scenes whether m/m, m/f, mmf, or mmm are the hardest bits of writing for me.
Another part, as a panster, I never genuinely set out to do one or the other or a variation. The story just spontaneously shows up from wherever my muse lives in my brain. I barely manage to plot out…the plot.
(The annoying part that I have zero control over. Fucking muse lol.)
I swear I had a point when I started this blog post, but I’ve gotten distracted.
I genuinely considered deleting this and starting over, but other autistic romance authors might appreciate and relate to seeing my struggles.