Romance Advice Blackbird Style.

I made the mistake of asking the pack for romance tips for wooing one’s mate. Here’s the mayhem that ensued:

How do you go about winning your mate?

Gareth: Smile, a lot, unless you’re Steve, then it’s bloody unnatural.

Darren: Make her laugh.

Natasha: Grab him by the balls, I find it makes things process along quickly.

Darren: It really does.

Josh: There is something seriously wrong with the two of you. Unnatural. I’d ignore them. If you want to win your mate, you have to figure out all of their guilty pleasures and ply them with it.

Darren: Says the bloke with no mate.

Josh: Yet.

Elaine: You’re both useless prats.

Steve: Settle down.

Darren: All right then, you old bastard, how did you woo your mate?

Steve: Patience.

Gareth: I think Ivy wooed us.

Elaine: Bloody waste of time.

(pause for momentary scuffling and knocking over of chairs.)

What’s the best part about having a mate?

Darren: She terrifies the lads.

Natasha: He looks good in leather.

Josh: Did I mention un-bloody-natural?

Elaine: The best part about not having one is I don’t have to listen to anyone whinging about the amount of time I spend online.

Josh: I weep for you.

Elaine: Prat.

Gareth: The best part about having a mate is I can use her as a buffer for Steve’s snoring.

Steve: Oi.

Gareth: Is Ivy going to see this? If so, on second thought, the best part about having Ivy is…just having Ivy. She’s brilliant.

Steve: Maybe next time you should just interview me?

Not sure how helpful that was but, there you go. The Blackbird Pack on mating.

Character Interviews: Elaine

Replacements1

Elaine would like everyone to know she’s participating under protest. I decided use some of the questions from the Proust Questionnaire for these character interviews.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Not having to answer stupid questions.

What is your greatest fear?

The pack finding out about my…issue.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

My inability to deal with social situations.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Brashness.

What is your greatest extravagance?

The elaborate gaming system set up in my tiny living room.

What is your current state of mind?

Busy. It’s always busy up there in my head.

On what occasion do you lie?

I’m a cougar shifter, we don’t lie, we simply evade.

What do you most dislike about your appearance?

My crazy ginger hair.

Which living person do you most despise?

My mother.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

Prat.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

The pack, don’t tell them.

When and where were you happiest?

When I’m hunting tiny creatures in the forest.

Which talent would you most like to have?

The ability to deal with people.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

Eh. I am who I am.

Where would you most like to live?

I like my cozy flat.

What is your most marked characteristic?

My narky temper.

What is it that you most dislike?

Velvet.

How would you like to die?

The least painful way possible.

What is your motto?

Always keep your cards close to your chest.

Character Interviews: Gareth

Two wolves playing near forest

Gareth Richardson is, I think, one of the most popular characters in the series. I decided use some of the questions from the Proust Questionnaire for these character interviews.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Ivy naked in my bed, oh, it’s fine if Steve’s there to. Is he going to read this?

What is your greatest fear?

I agree with Steve on Ivy being snatched up again.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

I’m not always as serious as I should be, though Steve’s serious enough for the both of us.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Pretentiousness.

What is your greatest extravagance?

I’ve spent a small fortune on my guitars.

What is your current state of mind?

Plotting.

On what occasion do you lie?

Whenever I think I can get one over on Steve.

What do you most dislike about your appearance?

Not a bloody thing, have you seen me?

Which living person do you most despise?

Anyone who dares look at Ivy the wrong way.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

Bloody.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

Ivy. And Steve.

When and where were you happiest?

In bed with a naked Ivy and Steve.

Which talent would you most like to have?

Twisting a cherry stem with my tongue would be a handy talent.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

There are days when I wish I had Steve’s ability to lead.

Where would you most like to live?

Somewhere warm.

What is your most marked characteristic?

My perfect grin.

What is it that you most dislike?

Steve looks better in a tux than I do, the bastard.

How would you like to die?

Some completely ridiculous way, just so it would give everyone a good laugh.

What is your motto?

Shit or get off the pot.

Character Interviews: Darren

Darren Martel is a character who was actually a little bit of a surprise. I decided use some of the questions from the Proust Questionnaire for these character interviews.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Beer, Footie and Natasha tied up.

What is your greatest fear?

Losing myself.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

I am too forgiving.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Cruelty.

What is your greatest extravagance?

My gaming system, I blame Elaine.

What is your current state of mind?

Chaotic.

On what occasion do you lie?

All the bloody time, I’m a fox.

What do you most dislike about your appearance?

That one freckle on my arse.

Which living person do you most despise?

Josh, because the stingy bastard owes me a fiver.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

I curse to damn much.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

Manchester City, oh and Natasha.

When and where were you happiest?

I’m happiest when City thrashes United.

Which talent would you most like to have?

I’m already talented.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I’m too generous with my forgiveness.

Where would you most like to live?

Buckingham Palace seems pretty posh, is it taken?

What is your most marked characteristic?

My sense of humour.

What is it that you most dislike?

Manchester United

How would you like to die?

Mid-Coitus.

What is your motto?

Who has bloody mottos these days? Don’t piss in your own bed.

Character Interview – Ivy

Ivy Langdon was the first character in the Blackbird series to appear in my mind. She’s one of my favourites as a result. I decided use some of the questions from the Proust Questionnaire for these character interviews.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Freshly baked scones with home-made jam, a large pot of tea and my two gits arguing in the background.

What is your greatest fear?

Losing someone I love, I know how bloody awful it feels.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

I hate my tendency to hermit myself away when I’m hurting.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

I dislike lying.

What is your greatest extravagance?

My cameras. I spend far more than I can really afford on my gear and studio.

What is your current state of mind?

Happy.

On what occasion do you lie?

Not very often, I usually avoid anything other than the occasional white lie.

What do you most dislike about your appearance?

My ears.

Which living person do you most despise?

Valentin Krupin and Marin Petrov.

What is the quality you most like in a man?

In general? A sense of humour. In my gits? I love Gareth’s laugh, and Steve’s smile

What is the quality you most like in a woman?

A sense of humour.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

Bugger, git, bloody.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

Ranulph says my greatest love is anything I see through the lens of my camera. He might be right. Though, the gits come a close second.

When and where were you happiest?

I was very happy with Alec, and I’m finding that again with Steve and Gareth. Though in general, I find I’ve been happiest when I’m letting my photography muse lead me around.

Which talent would you most like to have?

I wish I could command attention like my mum does.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I wish I hadn’t hermitted quite as long as I did.

Where would you most like to live?

Wales.

What is your most marked characteristic?

I think I have a rather brilliant photographic eye.

What is it that you most dislike?

Bugs.

How would you like to die?

In my sleep, I’ve felt enough pain. I’d like to be blissfully unaware when I finally die.

What is your motto?

It’s better to laugh than to cry.

Character Interviews: Natasha

NatashaFullCover600 Natasha Itsov is a character who was actually a little bit of a surprise. I decided use some of the questions from the Proust Questionnaire for these character interviews.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

Hunting rabbits in icy cold conditions.

What is your greatest fear?

Being brought down by something simple and mundane.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

Emotions.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Touchy-Feely displays of affection.

What is your greatest extravagance?

My custom built lane-splitter motorbike.

What is your current state of mind?

Calm.

On what occasion do you lie?

Whenever I deem it necessary.

What do you most dislike about your appearance?

Nothing.

Which living person do you most despise?

Marin Petrov.

What is the quality you most like in a man?

I admire most when a man knows when to walk away.

What is the quality you most like in a woman?

Intelligence.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

Ebat. (It means fuck in Ukrainian).

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

I refuse to answer.

When and where were you happiest?

When I was very young, and when I spent time with the person who I refuse to talk about.

Which talent would you most like to have?

I wish I could cook like my grandmother.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

My regrets.

Where would you most like to live?

Somewhere with snow.

What is your most marked characteristic?

Determination.

What is it that you most dislike?

Animal traps.

How would you like to die?

Taking down criminals.

What is your motto?

Do not give in.

Interview with 2 Blondes Books n’ Booze

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The Questions: Beth

1. What trope do you wish authors would run far, far away from? Pregnancy

2. The one book you’ll re-read over and over and over: The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)

3. If you could rewrite one book to change one part of it, which book would you choose and what would you change? See #1… Fifty Shades – Why does everyone have to get pregnant…kids ruin it 🙂

4. Do you have a favorite place to read? Anywhere there is quiet

5. Tell us a little bit about why you started book blogging: I read over 250 books last year, and made Erin read a lot of them. It was her suggestion to blog about them.

6. What’s the one thing you can’t live without? Wine… ok maybe Erin

7. And finally a quick round of pick one:
Coffee or Tea: Coffee
Sweet or Salty: Salty
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla
Hot or Cold: Hot
Laptop or PC: Laptop
Paperback or Ebook: ebook

The Questions: Erin

1. What trope do you wish authors would run far, far away from? Pregnancy

2. The one book you’ll re-read over and over and over: This Man by Jodi Ellen Malpas

3. If you could rewrite one book to change one part of it, which book would you choose and what would you change? Beth and I feel the same way about this… See #1… Fifty Shades – Why does everyone have to get pregnant…kids ruin it 🙂

4. Do you have a favorite place to read? Outside

5. Tell us a little bit about why you started book blogging: Our friends kept asking us what we were reading last year. With Beth and I enjoying so many books, I decided starting 2 Blondes Books N’ Booze would be a great way for everyone to see what we were reading. Since we are usually enjoying a glass of wine or cocktail while reading, pairing it with the books was only natural. That is when 2 Blondes Book N’ Booze was created.

6. What’s the one thing you can’t live without? Sunshine…and of course Beth.

7. And finally a quick round of pick one:
Coffee or Tea: Tea
Sweet or Salty: Sweet
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Hot or Cold: Hot
Laptop or PC: Laptop
Paperback or Ebook: Ebook

Find the Blondes at:

https://www.facebook.com/2BlondesBooksNBooze?ref=hl

www.2blondesbooksnbooze.com

Twitter – @2BlondesBNB

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